Relationships, acceptance, love, and belonging are our deepest human needs. We are designed
to relate to God, and each other. In a fallen world, people mess up on all these things probably
more than anything else, and are searching for answers on the Internet. There is a big need for
pages that really identify with people in these felt needs.
Here is a selection of pages. You may or may not agree
with every part or every approach in what is a very sensitive area, but they are offered here as snapshot
of what is possible. Read also how the same approach is being used on
Australian TV.
Please tell us of other pages to add. There is certainly a big need
for more pages to cover these subjects sensitively and in an accessible non-condemning way.
- Net-burst.net carries several pages:
You can find Love: what your fantasies reveal
The Romance Page: a selection of romantic cyber greeting cards
with links to evangelistic sites
Handling Rejection: laughs and inspiration from the lives of famous people
These are also available on a growing range of languages.
- Outreach sites IamNext.com (for teens) and
Women Today Magazine
frequently address issues of sex and relationships within the broader context of life issues.
Both sites are written entirely for non-Christians with great wisdom in terms of style, approach and ethos - read
our case study about the women's site.
- Seeker-friendly Mothers of PreSchoolers (MOPS)
includes life-issue pages such as this one on libido following childbirth.
- Stonewall Revisited - an evangelistic site aimed
at the needs of gay people. It's operated by Campus Crusade, who pass on counseling requests to
specialists within other ministries.
- Fires of Darkness helps both Christians and
non-Christians who have a problem with p--n addiction. "We have forums, discussion lists for addicts and wives of addicts, information about filtered internet access and accountability programs, a study course, counseling recommendations, and more."
- Romantic.com takes romance as a starting point. The tag line is "1000s of Creative
Ideas & Expert Advice on Love, Dating & Romance". It certainly looks like a secular site - though
without the excesses and assumptions you might expect. But site creator Michael Web says, "I am a
Christian - I'm even a youth pastor. My website comes from a Christian point of view, but is
geared to a secular audience. Because I don't flaunt my Christianity I have been able to get
close to many people and have even been able to help lead several of my newsletter subscribers
to Christ."
- Learning Love looks at wider issues concerning love and general relationships. Benjamin, the webmaster, comments:
"I have been very aware of the need to reach people of all faiths with the message that faith-filled
living is a way to fulfilling life; including love relationships and the challenges we all face. Love is
a universal need, but it's also a God-given gift that shares in spiritual realms. As we love we can
come to know God's love. I hope to share meaningful dialogues to help others improve their life, love and circumstances. I
make no apologies for using scriptures as the basis for my writing. I share in a universal context
that helps make the principles real for most people."
- The Sane Sex Site - Christian journalist and humorist Jim Watkins brings his unique approach to bear on sex and relationships
in a style which is accessible and uncondemning to non-Christians.
- The Marriage Bed aims to provide
sexual advice for married Christians - something which even in today's world is rare, often forcing
people to look to secular sources instead. Inevitably, of course, many non-Christians find these
pages, where they receive sensitive advice from a conservative Christian couple.
"When you talk about sex you get a lot of visitors who are not saved and were not looking for the Lord.
One woman who was a nominal Christian told us that she came to our e-mail list to try and justify having an affair.
As a result of the love and ministry she received from other members of the list she became more committed to the Lord,
her marriage is much better, and her two children got saved. I just love it when God does things like that!"
For related books in this area, see
Passionate Commitment.
- All about Cohabiting
aims to present practical arguments against living together in a sensitive manner appropriate
to non-Christians.
- The Rising Price of Love -
275 page online book by Dr Patrick Dixon, Christian writer and future-commentator.
- xxxchurch - quirky and individualistic style. Primarily for young Christians,
but the relaxed style makes it accessible for non-Christians also.
- Possibly Pregnant -
the online face of Corvallis Pregnancy Care Center (Oregon USA):
"We developed the site to primarily target students in our small college
town (pop. 50,000). The challenge was to create a positive, hopeful
online environment where Christians and non-Christians alike could find
help in time of need."
- There are ministries which help both Christians and non-Christians in the areas of divorce and
health e.g. miscarriage support, childlessneess,
post-abortion trauma, and death of a baby.
- The Extreme in Body Piercing -
something of a decoy site, you may or may not feel appropriate!
Filtering options
The Web has a dark side, and we need to be aware of ways to handle it.
Web Access
It is hard to find the best solutions for filtered web access, to protect both ourselves and
our children.
FilterReview.com
gives comparative reviews of filtered services - though mainly within USA.
There are many other solutions listed at
Google
though many are office services rather than for individuals.
Cybersitter and
BsafeOnline
are well reviewed as end-user software installations.
Email filtering
There does not currently seem to be any one-stop site that explains the different options available to
filter and delete p--n and other types of spam email, which have grown exponentially recently.
If you know of a definitive site that does this, please
advise us.
Many solutions are listed at
Dmoz
but the choice is so bewildering without the guidance of comparative reviews, that most people
do not know where to start.
We are all at risk
Online p--n represents a problem not only for children and teens, but also for mature Christians.
A frightening percentage are hurt in this way. Read the accounts of
eight singles.
It is 100 times harder to escape a developing addiction than to never start!
A key verse is
Job 31:1.
Be aware that you
may be most vulnerable when tired, lonely, or away from home. Avoidance strategies include
placing your monitor where it is always in view of other people, using filtering, and adding
accountability software to your computer. This will email to a chosen accountability partner a list of all the sites you have visited. Software available includes
Covenant Eyes |
NetAccountability |
W3 Watch (free).
It is also important to be accountable to others in all areas of our lives.
Recovery from these issues is hard, and accountability software then becomes essential.
Study courses which include mentoring help are available from Setting Captives Free.
Other helpful sites for recovery include
Pure Intimacy |
Fires of Darkness |
Christians in Recovery |
It would be a useful service if someone could create a portal which
brings together family-friendly advice on all these aspects of filtering and protection, accountability, addiction, and help, on
a worldwide basis - a definitive one-stop resource.